ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
