Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
