That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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