Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize