im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize