And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize