This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize