they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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