He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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