Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
