Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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