Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize