Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
wow bdsm is so cute
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
