ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize