I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
We have so much sex to catch up on
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize
