She is in my trunk
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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