Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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