I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Randomize
