i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
