I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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