just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize
