Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize