it wasn't lemon gatorade
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
