Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
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