gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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