next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
