I seem to have left my pride at pride
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
