So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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