Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
