Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
