There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize