he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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