What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
