Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
