So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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