Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize