And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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