Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
