? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
