Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
