is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Randomize
