I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
