You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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