why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
