Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
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