Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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