I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
