How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
