Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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