I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize