Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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