with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize